Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.

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(810): View more from Michigan

I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...

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(408): View more from California

i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.

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(708): View more from Illinois

You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.

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(574): View more from Indiana

I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.

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(540): View more from Virginia

That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....

(1-540): View more from Virginia

It was the best sex i've ever had.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK

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(702): View more from Nevada

there is another microwave in the elevator.

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