You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
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There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
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HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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