were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
