It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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