I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
