She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
