I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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