I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
