didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
