Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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