I think I died a long time ago.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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