I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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