I wanna bring you to show and tell
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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