we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
