worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
My ATM looks so different sober.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize