You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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