Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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