Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
