Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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