yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
