ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize