Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
