Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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