did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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