This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
