Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize