If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
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And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
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You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize