do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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