you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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