remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
