me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
