I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
