I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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