Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
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You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
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Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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