Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
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Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
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Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction