I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
