No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
