Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
