remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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