i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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