sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
So much Jack, so little girl.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
