Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize