just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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