I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
