yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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