I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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