Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
