Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
