we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
