Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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